The Adu-Kissi Family Photography Session

For the May single mum family photo shoot I met up with Cassandra and her boys Toby and Jayden. Cassandra leads a busy life and is always on the go and I can see that these boys must keep her on her toes! Turning up to their family photography session at Rouse Hill Regional Park the boys were a little nervous, however it didn’t take long before they were running amok like the active boys their mum had described.

It had been raining all weekend, so there were plenty of fresh puddles around. After we took care of the essential family photos it was time to do what kids do best… get dirty, and boy did they do it well. It was a great opportunity to get some fun, candid and chaotic photos of Toby and Jayden. While the boys were a little cautious at first they were soon right at home in the muddy puddles… the look on their faces when they first got mud on them – as if to say ‘Mum’s going to kill me!’ I must check in with her to see if it all came out in the wash : )

Toby and Jayden are great boys and are obviously great mates, I’m happy to be able to give them and Cassandra these family photos to look back on.

Read more about what Cassandra has to say on being a single mum and see some of the highlights from their family photography session below.

How long have you been a single mum?

8 months

How has being a single mum changed you?

Initially, I couldn’t see that I had changed much in becoming a single mum, aside from the need to step up and occasionally play both roles as a parent and the need to better organise my time between the kids, work and my own study which has been the biggest challenge, but on reflection I would say that my outlook has changed as a single mum. I now call on friends and family for help when I need it, as I am not one who normally asks for help, this for me has been my biggest change in myself.

Is there anything you’d like all non single mums to know about single motherhood?

Being a single mum can be a challenge and tiring but for me it was also a relief to be a happier version of myself outside of my relationship. Being a single mum grows an inner strength that you sometimes don’t realise you possess. I didn’t realise how much people would be willing to help me after my separation, as I thought I was on my own, but the reality is you are never on your own you just need to reach out to friends and family who can be a great support both in coming to terms with your separation but also assisting with arrangements with your children. No matter how hard it may seem you will always find a way to resolve any problem, it just may not be the answer you want.

What advice can you give to other women who are about to be single mothers?

Never be afraid to be yourself, to accept yourself and all your flaws. Your kids love you no matter what and I think that we need to do the same to ourselves. Accept help when offered and don’t be afraid to put yourself first every now and then, your kids need you to be happy and healthy. Avoid comparing yourself with others and accept that we all need to do whatever works for your family to be happy.

What is the hardest part?

There can be lonely days and nights, particularly when your kids are with their dad. The silence can be hard when you are used to a noisy household. The loss of the family unit as we knew it can be hard such as not being able to share all the good and bad things, no longer going on family holidays, even in this photo shoot I felt guilty not sharing this with their dad who is still a very active part of their life. These are the hard parts.

What is the best part?

Spending time with my kids as a happier self is definitely a positive. I get lots and lots of extra cuddles from my boys than I did before and time feels more special and valued when I have them. My kids seem to have adjusted really well with the time between houses and that is all I could have asked for.

How did you find working with Nick and Barley Monks Photography?

Nick was great in encouraging the kids to explore and play whilst capturing some great photographs. Both of my boys were a little reluctant before arriving to the session however they quickly forgot this reluctance and were having a great time running around the park and performing for the camera. The session itself was a great experience for the boys and I.